Revisionist History

This started out as an essay on my experiences in leadership for the Honors College application at WCU, but quickly jumped the rails of the question and grew to 50% more than the word count limit.  But I kinda liked it, so here it is.  It's a bit stream-of-consciousness and rough and unedited, but whaddayagonnado - it's a blog.

I have a great deal of trouble deciding what the “most significant accomplishment” I have made in the past few years has been. As mentioned in the listing of other activities, I was a Field Organizer for Barack Obama’s campaign in Indiana, and served in Peace Corps in West Africa. These experiences changed my life and how I see myself on a fundamental level; the past 18 months have been some of the most tumultuous I have ever experienced. But the trouble I have is not in determining which experience was the greater of the two, or had the most impact on those around me, but if either had any impact beyond the psychological effects on me.

Neither experience ended in a satisfying manner - both ended abruptly and without much opportunity for closure. My time at the campaign ended very quickly: only a weekend passed between hearing of my acceptance to Peace Corps and leaving for the East coast to prepare. I’ve never quit a job so quickly. And Peace Corps takes no chances with health issues of any kind. A diagnosis of anything untreatable in-country is referred quickly up the bureaucratic ladder for a decision. Between that decision and my flight out of Conakry, only about 18 hours passed. So while I would have liked to have ended both experiences very differently, they were both quite rewarding while they continued.

I’m from the East coast - born and raised around Philadelphia - and except for a year spent in small-town Illinois, I’ve lived either here or in the suburbs of DC. So the environment of rural, red-state Indiana was very close to the culture shock I would experience later in Guinea. The amount of work that people were willing to put in to a candidate that most of the neighbors wouldn’t dream of voting for was staggering. The volunteers that came into my office day after day, after their 40-hour work weeks, time in the fields, or time spent caring for children, were extraordinary. I felt, and still feel, very privileged to work with such people. It’s hard to say if my unique contributions added anything to their experiences or willingness to work, but I like to think it did. One volunteer in particular, Marian Abowitz (whom I will never forget), actually volunteered more than 40 hours most weeks, and she was as motivating as she was motivated. She was my right arm during the hectic times, which quickly became all of the time, and she kept my spirits up when it seemed like no one would take my calls. She once told me that I was making a real and unique impact, not just being a body filling a role. If her flattery (which absolutely worked) is right, then I’m happy with my time on the campaign. FOs, DFOs, RFDs and every other acronym possible came into Indiana when McCain’s staffers all but pulled out of Wisconsin, and three of them took over my office. Marian told me that it took all of them to fill my shoes, and that was quite a boost as well.

Peace Corps was a very different experience. In reality, Guinea is nothing like rural Indiana (that could probably have gone unsaid). My thoughts on my experiences there could fill a novel. To parse it down, I felt like the proverbial fish out of water, but my choking was no proverb. We were barely out of training when I had to leave, but even that was a mind-altering experience. We were told that we would be leaders and teachers in our communities, and it terrified me. All of my friends that scattered around Africa and other parts of the world following the closure of Peace Corps/Guinea are braver folks than I. They are real leaders and teachers, despite and maybe because of their struggles.

I never got the chance to be a leader in Guinea, and I can’t get unbiased review of my impact in Greencastle, but I learned so much about what it takes to be a leader, a follower, a volunteer, and a member of a struggling community. I wish beyond reason that my contributions in either place could have been more significant, and maybe I’ll get that chance again someday. But these experiences did fundamentally change me. If I can cause even one other person to be as aware as I feel now, then I’ll be happy.